auld lang syne

this is it. a new year. 2007 is “last year” (s0 last year). we had a fast year. we moved to california from utah. ryan started a “big boy” job that he loves (and rocks at), ava learned to crawl and turned one and broke her leg and learned to walk and talk. i started [...]

home wrecker

i was at trader joe’s the other day, when i saw my old boss shopping with his wife. not only was he my old boss, he went to law school with my dad and has a son the same age as me. he used to tell me the same story over and over again, about [...]

gratitude

i know it’s the week after the thanksgiving week, but i wanted to do this all last week and i just never got around to it. i baked all wednesday, had a ryan’s-family thanksgiving that night, baked and cooked all thursday with my mom (we were fight-free this year!), had a my-family thanksgiving with my [...]

post-script

even if i could have it all, i wouldn’t. the problem isn’t having it all, it’s not being able to put my whole heart in to something. i want to give ryan and ava my whole heart all the time and not fantasize about finishing school or traveling.

my heart is in many places

I’ve been reading a book called “to hell with all that” by caitlin flanagan which has been really, really good. it’s a collection of essay’s dedicated to understand a woman’s role–both traditionally and as a modern woman. so much of it rings true for me.before i had ava, before i even met ryan, i had [...]

shoes

yesterday we ordered chinese food from this delicious place. it was going to be a my-side-of-the-family dinner, so i went to pick up the food and my mom stayed home with ava (toby came with me, he has serious attachment issues). when i got to the restaurant, i moved to put my shoes on and [...]

I’m all tagged up

I was tagged by tiffany. this version of the game is list 7 habits/quirks and then tag 7 people.
1. i have a very small attention span when it comes to clothes. it’s not that i don’t care, it’s that i can’t keep up the caring. it just sort of fizzles out. so i’m interested while [...]

old me and new me

last night ryan had a meeting for church stuff and ava went down just as he left so i had an evening all to myself. like i used to have. . .a long time ago. i quickly tidied (love that word, it is so neat and clean itself that it makes me picture my neat [...]

from december

I wrote this last December (almost a year ago). What amazed me the most is that i still agree ABOSLUTELY with everything on the list!
things that should never end:ava (she giggled for the first time yesterday and it was wonderful! what an awful thought to think that one day she’ll grow up and leave me)
rodge [...]

how society discriminates against mothers who bottlefeed and favors mothers who breastfeed

yesterday i took ava to her one-year checkup (she is 21.6 pounds and 31 centimeters which means fails to impress me because i measure by way of the inch and am too lazy to find a ruler). while at our appointment, dr kundell (lovely man) asked me if i bottle fed or breastfed (bottle. this [...]